I Heart Swear Words

I think bribery is a pretty affective way to deal with many situations. I don’t care who you are, we’ve all bribed someone at some point in our lives.

My little one has been learning how to swim. This week was week 3. Last week didn’t go too well. He cried, screamed and shook his way through as much of the lesson as we could put him through before I scooped him up in a big hug and took him home. I was concerned about how todays lesson would go. I started talking to A early on in the morning, trying to hype him up about the whole thing. He kept responding with “nah, I go to swimming lessons tomorrow” so I wasn’t going to get my hopes up. I did, however, say that if he gave swimming lessons a good go today that I would get him a new toy boat.

Little A is very excited about boats. He’s like a junkie for them. Boats and Hot Wheels cars. Needless to say, the promise of a new boat was all that was needed. He jumped into the water with his teacher and had a blast. He even called out “look mummy, I’m not even crying today”. He was so proud. Every time he learnt a new trick he’d turn around and give me the double thumbs up. I coulda cried.

And that is why I heart bribery.

Urgh, just thinking about it makes me want to gag.

On the weekend I took my boy (A, who is almost 4) to a public swimming pool. Not the pool we usually go to, which is a bit wizz bang and heated, but the kind of dodge council one, which smells of urine and wet cigarette butts.

We were playing around for a while in the kiddy pool. Just wading around enjoying the cool water under the hot sun. Life was sweet. Until………. I looked at his chest and noticed he had shit on it. Not just in one spot either, but in numerous places all over his torso. Just flecks of crap here or there. It seemed that as soon as I’d wipe one bit off, it would multiply gremlin style. Fucking yuck. I checked him out, and it wasn’t something that he had done, he had just (un)luckily attracted it to his person. Some people are sooooo manky.

I had lost my USB cable for my MP3 player. It’s the dodgy kind of MP3 player you buy through ebay that gets sent over from Hong Kong for a ridiculously cheap amount of money. Needless to say, replacing the cable is mighty expensive. If my memory serves me correctly, the generous people at Tandy quoted me almost as much as the MP3 player cost me in the first place.

Being a newly formed tight-arse, there was no way I was going to spend stupid amounts of money on something like that. I was having a whinge about it to a friend over the weekend, and after I completed my diatribe he took me to look in his rather impressive box of cables. After about 4 seconds of searching he came out with the exact cable I needed, and gave it to me for nothing.

I heart free stuff.

Today I was the kind of day where I am really grateful that other people exist. Normally they give me the shits, but not today.

Today I came to terms with the fact that I had lost my Sarah Blasko concert tickets (one for me, one for a friend). I was heart broken. I thought that all was lost coz I didn’t pay by credit card. Instead I went all old school and went in to a Ticketek office and bought them. After much convincing I gave them a call and they told me that they could cancel the tickets I had and reissue them on to me on the night. YAY!

After my win with the ticketing people I took my lad for a drive down the coast near where I work. We were looking for a Pre-School closer to my office, instead of an hour away. Since it was a stinking hot day we stopped at McDonalds around the corner from work to get ourselves a refreshing drink. Only then did I realise that my wallet was sitting on my coffee table back home, a whole hour and a half away. With my tail between my legs I skulked in to work with my tale of woe. My lovely and wonderful colleague ran off to the bank to get some money to not only get us a drink and some lunch, but so I could do the shopping I’d planned to do. Bless her little cotton socks.

I could have kissed just about anyone today.